Between Your Mountaintops




Between Your Mountaintops 

     I’ve celebrated triumphs and I’ve stood at edges of muddy graves where graveside dirt stained my shoes. Little did I know it would stain my soul too. At times, I felt alone. Other times, I was unaware and too young to care that there were armies of prayer warriors in the background begging angels to surround my situation. I didn’t see that picture of my life until three days ago. The past few days, I cried out from the background for everyone involved in a tragedy. 

     Every loss brings a different grief experience. Some find relief when a person’s pain ends; others embrace anger and question, “Why didn’t we give them more time to heal?” We are born with an expiration date and warned trials will try to steal our peace.  (John 16:33). Knowledge doesn’t make trials and endings better. When life hurts us, we must make tough choices. 
  •  We can shut down, give up 
  •  Create a life that honors and inspires others
  •  Catch our breath and keep going 

     In despair, we must learn to breathe on our walk with grief. There will be stumbles and darkness will try to destroy you. Moment by moment, we must choose to give up or go on. In my mourning, my sanity only survives because  I  embrace celebration and pain.  I choose to keep going so that  I may rise to my best self and impact the world around me with love. 

Healing is always promised, yet sometimes it comes as perfection, not intervention. 

     I’ve been thrown into death’s valley, crawled through thorn bushes in shackles, and floated paralyzed in tear-filled rivers and streams. I had to fight for relief. No words, verse, or song could open my eyes to the sunshine; however, I didn’t give up. Every obstacle I overcame and every razor-sharp rock I rolled down left its mark. Those scars remind me that I made it through grief's traps and freedom was only found by continuing my journey. 

     The climb takes a lifetime. When you reach your resting spots, look around. There will be views to show you how far you’ve come and how far you must go. You will be in the in-between. There, you will find what you need for the next mile of your life. You will make a choice to catch your breath, create, or stop. The in-between does not have to be your end; it may become your best beginning. Loneliness will try to become your traveling companion, but you are not alone. You are on the bridge to where you need to be, and that bridge requires another choice. 

     The view from my recent plateau shows me that I am no longer stuck in the valley. It reminds me that my life story is greater than what I see, feel, or want – so I choose to keep going. 

Today, I choose to create. I hold my heart out in my hand. Take what you need, and I will heal. 



I was born with an expiration date unrevealed to me. 

Looking across life’s canyon, my tear-filled eyes see: 

I’ve made it this far; I am not alone. 

This is just a moment, not my forever home. 


I’m only here for a journey, 

A soul who understands mourning. 

I won’t dwell in the valley too long 

Because Heaven sings my love song. 


I’m determined to touch your heart 

Before it’s my time to depart. 

I don’t know the whys, 

But I understand your cries. 


You’re not alone on this painful road 

No matter what lies you’ve been told. 

I won’t guarantee that it will feel fine, 

So- I’ll take your hand, please take mine. 


You must keep going to thrive, 

That is how you’ll survive. 

Don’t fear the breakthrough, 

Embrace you - becoming you. 


Grief is cruel and it won’t play nice, 

Your heart will burn or become ice. 

It’s just life’s way of reminding you to live 

Because you have so much love to give. 


You’re still here – mark your mark.

There’s a light within your dark! 

Take the  time to restore and heal, 

Breathe in and out, it’s OK to feel. 


At times, you won’t know what to say, 

Maybe it won’t make sense to pray. 

I don’t have a soul-soothing answer, 

Or a quick fix to grief's cancer.


This will be your hardest fight. 

Hold my hand, hold it tight… 

Shelly Ambrose










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